Doug Larson

My wife and I are opposites.  She loves to talk and I prefer to listen.  She and her sister sometimes talk simultaneously and neither seems to be listening to the other.  When my wife was interviewing people for our book, It's Okay to Cry, she discovered that she often talked while others were talking.  When she transcribed the audiotapes, she could not hear the other person because she was talking over him.  She learned a valuable lesson about listening.  I have also discovered that talking can energize me.  After giving a speech, I want to keep talking but there is no one to listen since everyone has fled.  Talking helps me to think through my problems and come to a better understanding of what is on my mind.

While talking can sometimes help us understand ourselves, listening helps us understand others. And by understanding others, we will better understand ourselves. If we listen to the words of others, they will teach us about life — both what to do and what not to do. 

When we spend our time talking, we become self-absorbed, caught up in our perceptions of the world, and unaware of those around us.  Listening allows us to step outside ourselves and see the world through the eyes of others.  Listening helps us grow and develop as compassionate individuals.

We probably learn more from the failures of others than we do from our successes. As writers, storytellers and artists, we need to understand other people — why they behave in the way they do.  What motivates them?  What drives them? The better we understand people, the more realistic and truthful our art will be.  

So take the time to listen to others and understand what makes them tick.  Your creative work will be stronger, wiser, and more engaging because of it.  

Henri Matisse

I have heard many wanna-be writers and artists say they are waiting to be inspired. They can only write or draw when inspiration strikes. Unfortunately, that is not the real world. If we wait for our muse to come, she may never arrive.  She is a fickle mistress who has her own agenda and cares not for our needs.

The key to finding your inspiration and to being creative is to work every day. Maybe it is for a half an hour or an hour, but one must do the work.  And when you least expect her, your muse will arrive wearing dancing shoes.  She will lead you into the heart of creativity and dance until your feet grow tired and your limbs ache.

And after your muse has left and gone to visit other lonely artists, don't throw your work away even if you feel that what you did was terrible. Let it sit and come back to it later and you will see it in a different light. Creativity is a process. It is messy and unorganized.  To produce great work, one must produce junk.  To achieve great work, one must fail again and again.    

Creative work is not easy.  Our conscious mind works against the spirit of creativity.  Our conscious mind attempts to distract us from the deep spiritual work by sending us to the refrigerator or demanding that we wash the clothes and vacuum the carpet.  We must be vigilant and not be deceived. 

May your muse fill your heart with joy 

and your soul with the spirit of creativity.

Ben Franklin

For many people learning stops after graduating from high school or college. They stop investing in themselves. While education will not cure all the world's problems, it will help us understand them and give us the skills to find the answers. 

I believe that reading is one of the most important ways of increasing one's knowledge.  I ask people when was the last time they read a book and many can't remember.  Some offer the excuse that they don't have the time between work and raising a family.  Others admit to not liking to read.

When I was a child growing up in the 1950s and 1960s, I had a more difficult time finding a good book than children do today.  In the farming community of 1800 where I grew up, there was a school library and a small community library.  The nearest bookstore was 25 miles away.  Yet, I was always able to find something to read even though my choices were limited.  Today, books are available in giant bookstores, through online bookstores, and in libraries. I can access and borrow books from libraries through out the state without leaving my home.  Books now come in several formats including the traditional printed books, audiobooks and ebooks.  And people have access to thousands of free books online.  Project Gutenberg offers over 49,000 free ebooks.

Learning, though, is not limited to books.  There are documentaries that teach us about the world in which we live as well as teach us new ideas and skills.  If you are a visual learner, like my wife, documentaries are a great way to learn new ideas.  And technology has now given us new ways to access this knowledge.  You can find documentaries on Netflix, Hulu and Youtube.

We can also find knowledge in seminars, workshops and lectures.  We can find workshops on many subjects from business topics to art, from cooking to writing, and from investing to storytelling.  TED Talks offers free lectures on many different topics.

We live in the information age.  There is an abundance of information.  I think if Ben Franklin suddenly appeared in our age that he would be amazed at the learning opportunities that people have.  Are you taking advantage of the plethora of knowledge at your finger tips?  When was the last time you learned a new skill? When was the last time you invested in yourself?

As creative leaders, we have a responsibility to invest in ourselves.  We need to grow and change.  We need to expand our knowledge base.  We need to find new ways of communicating our ideas.  Take the time today to invest in yourself.

Dale Carnegie

Many of us are afraid to take a risk, to try something new.  We keep waiting for the right time.  Unfortunately, there is never going to be a right time.  When we stop risking, we start dying one day at a time.  The more safe we feel the less risk we take.  Security and safety are illusions of the mind.  We are never 100% safe.  I read a story about a woman who was driving on a country road and was killed by tree that fell and hit her car.  Just being alive is a risk. 

Taking a risk does not mean that you have to throw caution to the wind and risk everything.  Planned risk is best.  How much are you willing to sacrifice?  What are you willing to lose?  Be ready with a plan B if plan A fails.  Think ahead.  I have seen people quit their jobs without having a new job in hand.  They are putting themselves and others at serious risk.  A better alternative would be to job hunt while employed.  Take the leap but have a safety net.  High wire walkers without a safety net risk death.

One of the biggest risks that I took in my career was when I made the leap into marketing and sales without any prior training or experience.  The risk could have cost me my job and my marriage, but fortunately, I passed the test.

Every time I submit my writing to an editor I am taking a risk — I am facing rejection.  Writing this blog is a risk because people may not read it.  Showing my art in an art show is a risk because people may criticize.

Begin with small risks that won't cause too much pain.  You have to know what you are willing to lose.  Many years ago when I visited Las Vegas, I discovered how much money I was willing to risk — $5.00.  I played the nickel slot machines and was happy to sit there for 3 or 4 hours both winning and losing.  I tried my hand at poker once and lost $20 in ten minutes and I quit.  I was not willing to lose my hard earned money.

Now, some of you may be laughing.  I am not a gambler.  I know when to walk away.  I know when to fold the cards.  Yet, I have taken major risks in my thinking.  I have questioned and challenged everything I have been taught.  I don't need hand-me down answers to the eternal questions we all ask.

What kind of risk are you comfortable with?  What are you willing to sacrifice?  Do you have a safety net?  Or do you throw caution to the wind and hope for the best?    Is there a risk that you should be taking but are not?  Take the risk.  

Bernie Siegel

Nature has a way of renewing itself quickly and swiftly. In the late 1960's Lake Erie, which is up the road from where I live, was declared dead. Today it is alive, although it is facing new challenges. If you have ever seen how quickly a forest renews itself after a fire, you will understand the meaning of this quote. In fact, I believe nature uses adversity has a way of cleansing itself from rot and then creating new opportunities. One simply has to observe the seasons to understand how nature renews itself.

And since we are a part of nature, we also have this gift. When adversity strikes, we can seize the opportunity and renew ourselves as needed.  We can change course and discover new paths to follow.  Each job change in my career has opened new doors for me.  One path has led to another. Adversity has created opportunity to change and grow.  Being fired from a job opened new doors.  Each failure was a new beginning.

Learn to let go of your old tired habits and plant new ones.  Are you stuck in a job you don't like? Seek a new one.  Are you tired of painting the same subjects over and over?  Find new subjects.  Step outside your comfort zone.  Are you tired of writing the same storyline over and over?  Expand you subject matter.  Sometimes we find ourselves in a rut.  We need to renew ourselves.  We need to let go of where we are so we can find our way to where we want to be.

Nature teaches to importance of rejuvenation and revitalization.  What are you doing to keep your art fresh?  Are you challenging yourself to write new books about subjects you have no experience with?  What are you doing to keep from becoming bored with what you do?  Develop habits that will keep you revitalized.  Renew your spirit with hope for new beginnings.

Alice Mackenzie Swaim

Strength often comes from unexpected places.  We sometimes misjudge people when we only look at the outside.  Inside is what counts.  Have you ever met someone who you liked instantly only to find out he was not the person you thought he was?  Have you ever met a person who you thought was rude and uncaring only to discover she was very warm and giving?

We can easily look at large oak trees and see how strong they are.  They stand tall and their root system goes deep within the earth.  Many live to be 200 years old.  Some have lived over a thousand years.  They weather many storms.  And we can not deny that it does take courage to survive the hostile storms of time.  

Have you ever looked into the face of an old person with pity and hope never to be like her? Or have you wondered about the storms she has weathered and the courage it took to live the hard life she led?  We often misjudge the courage buried within the hearts of the people we meet.

Yet, it is the flower in spring that survives a late snow that draws our attention.  By nature, it is fragile and its life is short.  Though, it has a rare courage that cannot be denied — to hold its petals high in the face of unwanted cold.  We have all met that child who faces death with a courage we fail to see within ourselves.

As artists, writers and storytellers, we must look deep inside and see the truth beneath the surface.  We must find the courage to tell our story in words and images.  Do you have the courage found within the flower poking through the snow?  Are you as strong as the oak tree standing in your backyard?  Are you able to look truth in the face and share the pain you have felt?

The Heart's Code — A Book Review

The Heart's Code: Tapping the Wisdom and Power of Our Heart Energy by Paul Pearsall
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Reading this book is like preparing to run a marathon.  Not because it is long.  It is only 228 pages.  Not because the writing is poor.  It is well written.  This book takes patience and time to read because each chapter, each paragraph and each sentence is packed full of content that needs to be absorbed and understood.  The first time I attempted to read this book, I set it aside after two chapters.  This time I ran the entire race and finished the book.
The essence of the book is best described by the subtitle:  Tapping the Wisdom and Power of Our Heart Energy. Paul Pearsall's key message is that the heart communicates through energy and he backs it up with scientific evidence.  The name he gives this energy is cardio-energetics.
Much of Pearsall's research has been done with heart transplant patients.  He tells a story early on about an eight year old girl who received the heart of a ten year old girl who had been murdered.  The young girl dreamed of the man who had murdered the girl and based on her description, the police were able to find him and convict him of murder.  The heart, Pearsall teaches, has the ability to remember.  He documents throughout the book many stories of heart transplant patients who remembered things from their donor that they should never have known.  Some even change their behavior like the foods they liked.
One of the powerful experiments that he shares occurred in 1993 under the direction of the United States Army Intelligence and Security Command.  The scientists scraped white blood cells from the mouth of a volunteer and placed them in a test tube with a probe from a polygraph detector.  The volunteer was placed in a room and shown violent scenes.  The test tube was placed in another room.  The polygraph detected extreme excitation  in the cells in the test tube even though they were down the hall.  Later experiments documented the same result even when the separation was 50 miles.  Pearsall says, "The donated cells remained energetically and nonlocally connected with their donor and seemed to 'remember' where they came from."
I strongly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in spirituality, energy work and the scientific basis for the power within the heart.  The heart is more than a pump that is at the beck and call of the brain.  The heart has the power to heal and a memory distinct from the brain.  The heart communicates at a much deeper level than mere words with the hearts it comes in contact with.  People in business today talk about leaders with emotional intelligence.  This book provides some of the scientific support for the importance of emotion and the heart.


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Henry Miller

I have found that one of the benefits of traveling is the opportunity to see the world through new eyes — to realize that there is more to life then the day-to-day petty challenges that I face.  Too often we become so involved in chopping down a tree that we fail to see that the world is filled with more trees than those on the tiny acre which we occupy.

Wandering the streets of new towns and cities and encountering new people changes our perspective of the world and our place within it.  We often realize that our problems and challenges are small and insignificant compared to those of other people.  We learn to see the world differently and through new eyes.

I have learned that taking the time to step away from my day-to-day challenges reduces the stress in my life and clears my head of the issues and problems that normally occupy center stage.

I discovered this my sophomore year in college.  My freshman year had been filled with concern about the problems and challenges facing the American people.  War was killing the youth of our nation as well as the men, women and children of Vietnam.  Riots were burning the hearts of our cities.  Martin Luther King, Jr and Bobby Kennedy were assassinated.  Young people were beaten in the streets of Chicago during the Democratic convention.  And I considered dropping out of school.

In September of 1968, I boarded a plane for Kingston, Jamaica with twenty other college students.  We spent 13 weeks immersed in the culture and history of the country as part of a Study-Service term abroad offered by our small church college.  We studied the Rastafarian movement, Spanish and British imperialism, banana plantations and Jamaican literature.  We spent seven weeks in a service project.

We did not read American newspapers or listen to American newscasts.  The problems in America faded slowly away.  The problems Jamaicans faced had less to do with race and more to do with economics.  War was not on the daily news.  Jamaicans were proud of their recent independence from Great Britain and believed they had a bright future.  The pace of life slowed and the stress of being a student in the turbulent sixties in America slowly faded away.  I began to see the world through new eyes.  

When I returned to the United States in December, the election was over and Nixon had won.  America still faced the same problems and challenges that it had when I left.  The world had not grown any better.  But I had changed.  I was still concerned about the issues, but I was calmer and understood that change took time.  I could not change the world, but I could change myself.  By stepping away, I had come to see the world differently.  I had come to see my place in the world with new eyes.

About Henry Miller
Henry Miller was born to German Lutheran parents in New York city in 1891.  He wrote several novels including Tropic of Cancer,  Tropic of Capricorn and Sexus.  He also painted 2,000 watercolors and played the piano.  He was married five times and died in 1980.

Zig Ziglar

Note to Reader:
(This blog post marks the fifth anniversary of my blog, Monday Morning Motivation.  I wrote my first post on August 7, 2010.  The first two years I posted daily.  The last three years I have posted weekly.  I have received over a quarter of a million page views during these five years.  So, thanks to everyone who has stopped by.)


I was 35 years old when I first heard about the importance of goal-setting in achieving one's dreams. In college I had dreamed of being a writer but at 35 was far from my dream. I had only written about 200 poems in 15 years. I set a goal to write a poem a day for a year. That year I wrote over 400 poems.

Now, after more than 30 years of setting goals and writing thousands of poems, I have come to understand what Ziglar means in this quote.  The person I have become through the process of struggling to achieve my goals is more important than whether I did or did not achieve my goals.  The journey, as others have said, is more important than the destination.

So, how has achieving my goals made me a better person, a better writer?  Has my journey been more important then my destination?  

My creative journey has given me a greater appreciation for the struggle of all creative individuals.  I understand what it means to be an artist or a writer.  I am less willing to criticize the creative works of others.  Yes, some of us may be more skilled than others, but we all have creative forces running through our veins.  I know what it means to put pen to paper or paint brush to canvas and not find an audience for my work.

I have a greater appreciation of the creative energy that drives my being.  If I don't write or draw, I become melancholy.  I need to expend my creative energy.  The more I create the happier I become.  Failure to create leaves me lifeless, empty.

I have gained the ability to create anywhere and anytime.  I can write a poem while sitting in a mall while my wife shops.  I can write in church while the minister is preaching.  I can doodle while sitting in a business meeting.  I can take a walk at 6 a.m. and compose a poem.  Creating works of art has for me become a way of life, not a destination.

And most importantly, through my creativity I have found spiritual healing and understanding.  As a teenager, I was troubled by the hypocrisy of church members.  Writing has helped me see beyond the hypocrisy and to gain an understanding of the hearts of others.  I am a better person for the time I have spent creating.

Have you set goals for your creative journey?  Have you come to understand that the journey is more important than the destination?

About Zig Ziglar

1926 - 2012

Hilary Hinton Ziglar was the tenth of twelve children born to John Silas Ziglar and Lila Wescott Ziglar.  When Ziglar was five, his family moved to Yazoo City, Mississippi where he spent most of his early childhood.  His father and sister died a year later.  Ziglar served in the United States Navy during World War II.  He married his wife, Jean, in 1946.

Zig Ziglar began his career as a salesman and eventually moved into motivational speaking. He wrote and published more than a dozen books including See you at the Top, Secrets of Closing the Sale and Confessions of a Happy Christian.

Hephzibah Menuhin

Some people believe that freedom means doing whatever one pleases.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  Freedom is about making choices.  And one's choices defines whom one becomes.  People seem to forget that freedom actually means taking responsibility for oneself and others.  Freedom is about choosing which burdens to bear.  Freedom is about choosing one's passions and obsessions.

As creative leaders, we are free to choose how we express our ideas, beliefs and opinions including what paints or metaphors to use.  Our freedom is in the choices we make.  But freedom is not just about our expression, it is also about our obsessions.  What are we focused on?  Where do we spend our time?  What are our passions?  What drives us to share?

Freedom is also about choosing to accept our burdens.  None of us live without pain or challenge.  We all face the darkness that haunts our dreams.  We must choose to accept that which weighs us down, to shoulder our responsibilities, to bear the brunt of our pain.

About Hephzibah Menuhin

Hephizibah Menuhin was born in San Francisco on May 20, 1920 and was descended from a distinguished rabbinical dynasty.  She became a pianist, writer and human rights activist.  She died January 1, 1981.

Jack Penn

To be human and to live with other humans is to face challenges and difficulties. We experience disappointments, heartaches, roadblocks, failures and even death. How we choose to respond to the challenges that life hands us is a measure of the type of person we are. Do we pick ourselves up and make something of what has happened or do we remain buried in the rubble wishing to die? 

One of the biggest challenges that we face as writers and artists is selling our work.  Writers send out manuscripts to publishers only to receive rejection slip after rejection slip.  Artists seek galleries to represent and sell their art and often must sell it themselves.  Making a living from creative work has always been a challenge.  Even Vincent Van Gogh, one of the most famous artists today, sold only one painting in his lifetime and that was to his brother.

Is the blank page or the empty canvas your stumbling block?  Is the lack of time preventing you from creating new work?  What is holding you back and preventing you from moving forward? Do you need to improve your skills? Do you lack commitment? Have you failed to set measurable goals?

As creative leaders, we have been given the gift of creativity which can help us turn our stumbling blocks into stepping stones. So get out your chisel and chip away at that stumbling block in your path. Find the opportunity hidden within the stone. Find the hope within the fear.  Grasp the victory from the claws of defeat. 

Book Review

Hard Choices by Hillary Rodham Clinton
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

First, let me say that prior to reading this book I was not a Hillary Clinton fan.  I supported Obama in the 2008 election.  And I was concerned that this book was just a brochure for her next run for president.  Fortunately, I was wrong.  This book is full of stories of her time as Secretary of State and the people she met.  I was fascinated and intrigued as I read it.  She tells stories of both failures of diplomacy and successes.  She provides insight into many of the key players on the international scene and some historical context to current events.

If you are interested in international politics, you should read this book with an open mind.  While you may not agree with Clinton's conclusions, you will have a better understanding of who Hillary Clinton is and the challenges the United States faces on the world stage.  And, yes, if she obtains the Democratic nomination, I will probably support her.  My only wish is that she would have remained as Secretary of State another four years instead of choosing to run for President.  She could have accomplished so much more.

I also have walked away with the belief that people who run for President should have spent time as Secretary of State.  Presidents have less influence on the internal affairs of the country than they do on the international scene.  Congress has greater control and influence on the American society than any one President.  Congress makes the laws and determines the direction of the country.  Decisions made in Congress are with us for generations.  Presidents can twist arms, but in the end, their influence is short-lived.  Presidents can do more on the world stage than they can at home.  Unfortunately, most candidates for President have very little experience on the international stage and waste much of their time in office learning how the world works.  If Presidents spent time as secretary of state before running for President, they would have a greater opportunity to influence world events.

I would recommend this book to anyone interested in international politics or in understanding what makes Hillary Rodham Clinton tick.  I also would recommend that you listen to the audio version of the book.  While Clinton read the opening and closing chapters of the book, she did not read the whole book.  Kathleen Chalfant did an excellent job of reading most of the book. Though, I would have preferred to have Hillary's voice all the way through.


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Book Review

The Cider House Rules by John Irving
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The Cider House Rules is another brilliant novel by John Irving, one of American's finest novelists.  I saw the movie based on the novel about 15 years ago.  I remember little of the movie except for Michael Caine who played Dr. Larch.  I liked the movie at the time and will now have to watch it again.  Irving is a phenomenal storyteller who tells his stories in a circular fashion.  Each circle reveals more of the story.  Detail after detail is slowly added to the story.

The story is about abandonment — about orphans and abortions and about unwanted children.  Dr. Larch has spent a lifetime doing what he calls: "God's work."  He delivers unwanted babies, raises them in the orphanage until he can find a home for them.  He also provides abortions to women who are early enough in their pregnancies.  At the heart of the story is Homer Wells for whom Dr. Larch could never find a home.  Larch teaches him how to deliver babies.  Homer ventures out into the world and his life becomes entangled with the lives of Candy and Wally.

This is a novel that everyone should read.


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Harley King

Are you on fire?  Are you burning with passion? Are you passionate about life? Some people walk through the world of existence lost in a fog. They have no idea what they want to do with their lives or what they want to accomplish.  They are simply trying to make it through the day so they can spend another night in their dirty beds.

Creative leaders must find their passion to be successful.  When I graduated from college, I wanted to be a writer, but did not know what I wanted to write about.  There was nothing I was passionate about.  Nothing that drove me to put pen to paper and spend hours writing. If you want to be successful, you must burn with passion.

When I began speaking many years later, I did have a passion.  I had a message I wanted to deliver.  I had a desire to make a difference.  I was on fire and I touched the hearts of others. If you put yourself on fire with passion, people will come to watch you burn.  People will be engaged and inspired.  If you are not passionate about what you do, people will not pay attention.

What is your passion?  What drives you to rise before dawn and create? What are you passionate about?  Passion helps you burn through the negativity and hostility that the world heaps upon your creative work.  Passion helps you to keep going even when everyone is telling you to quit.

Harley King

The home is one of the most important places in the lives of people from all around the world.  It should be a place of retreat and comfort, a place of hope and rejuvenation, and a place where we rest our head at night and restore our spirit.  Yet, how often do we take our home for granted?  How often do we fail to appreciate what we have?  How often do we look at our neighbors and wish we had their homes?

My seven year old daughter reminds me again and again about how important the home is.  Whenever we talk about moving, she wants to bring our house with us.  For her, the home is a safe and loving place.  

Here are some quotes that talk about the importance of home.

• "Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do . . . but how much love we put into that action."  Mother Teresa
• "The strength of a nation derives from the integrity of the home." Confucius
• "I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself."  Maya Angelou
• "He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds peace in his home."  Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
• "The light is what guides you home, the warmth is what keeps you there."  Ellie Rodriguez

Changing the world begins at home.  I believe we first need to change ourselves before we can change others.  Second, we need to change our home before we can change our village.  What are you doing to make your home a place of peace and love, a place of warmth and conversation, and a place of hope and respect?

Harley King

Who inspires you to be better than you are?  Is it a grandparent?  A parent?  A sibling?  A spouse?  A daughter?  A son?  We all need someone to push us to be better than we think we are?  We need someone who sees the talents in us that we don't see ourselves.

For me that has been my wife of 42 years.  Whenever I don't think I can do something, she is there to push me beyond the barriers of my thinking.  Whether it starting a new job that I doubted if I could be successful or getting me to do something I think is impossible.  She often sees what I cannot see.

Do you seek to find the good in others?  Do you seek to push them to do more then they think possible?  We have all been put on this earth to help others — to inspire them.  To help them become more than they are.  By helping others achieve their dreams, we achieve our own. By inspiring others, we inspire ourselves.  What we give out is what we receive back.

A little girl lived up in the mountains with her parents.  One day she became upset at her mother and ran out of the house.  She came to the edge of a cliff, and in her anger, she yelled at the top of lungs: "I hate you. I hate you."

Her own words came echoing back to her: "I hate you. I hate you."  Scared, the little girl ran back into the house and told her mother that someone hated her.  The mother realized what had happened and told her daughter to go back out and shout, "I love you."

Although the little girl was afraid, she tiptoed back to the edge of the cliff and shouted: "I love you. I love you."  Echoing back came the words: "I love you. I love you."

What we send out is what we receive back.  Do you look for the good in others?  Do you seek to inspire them?

Harley King

Much of the self-help literature stresses the importance of confidence.  When we make a decision, we should not look back.  We should not question ourselves.  We should not doubt ourselves.  We should act as if we have no fear.

Yet, self-doubt can be a good thing since it prevents us from becoming overconfident.  When people are overconfident, they make mistakes.  They assume too much and become reckless. Doubt gives us the opportunity to step back and reassess the situation — to make sure we are making the right decisions.  

Have you ever made a decision and then had second thoughts?  This is normal.  We often second-guess ourselves.  Most of the time our initial decision was the best one and we should move forward.  But occasionally, this moment of reassessment gives us the opportunity to change course and correct our mistake.

My wife and I spent our honeymoon in Acapulco, Mexico.  Since we were young with almost no money and I had only a part-time job, my parents paid for our trip.  One day a young man offered us a free dinner if we would attend a sales pitch about time shares.  We took him up on his offer.  Now, I am a sucker for a good sales pitch and I bought hook, line and sinker.  I signed the contract even though I did not have enough income to make the monthly payment.

Even before the ink was dry on the contract, doubt set in.  I knew I had made a mistake.  I could not afford the deal no matter how good it was.  People can read me like a book and I am sure the salesman could read the doubt and even fear on my face.  He made the mistake of telling me that if I was not satisfied, I could tear up the contract.  I didn't hesitate.  I tore up the contract and walked out of the room, not waiting for my wife.

My young bride was shocked and embarrassed by my behavior and she has not let me forget it in 42 years of marriage.  Of course, now we laugh about my cold feet and doubt.  Yet, I know I made the right decision.  Sometimes, doubt protects us from ourselves and our impulses.

Yes, self-confidence is important to success, but self-doubt is a lighthouse that will keep you from running aground.  Don't become shipwrecked on the rocks of time. Be willing to rethink your decisions and change course.

Harley King

Let me begin by saying that I cannot carry a tune.  The irony is that I have spent 25 years leading people in singing as part of a customer service workshop.  The music touched people's hearts and changed their lives.  

Singing has the power to soothe the savage beast that lives inside all of us.  Music will cheer you up when you are down.  Singing can lighten your load and free your soul from the burdens it carries.  Music communicates at a deeper level than mere words or pictures.

When I was in college and I felt down, I would walk the railroad tracks that ran through campus and sing to myself.  Singing cheered me up and helped me feel better about myself and the world.  I would sing then and often still do the first two lines from the old gospel song, Lonesome Valley.  I didn't know the lyrics to the entire song but these two lines stuck in my memory.

"You gotta walk that lonesome valley
You gotta walk it by yourself."

Here is Pete Seeger singing a version of that gospel song.

Often when I am alone and need to pick myself up, I sing the chorus to another gospel song, Swing Low, Sweet Chariot.  

"Swing low, sweet chariot,
Comin' for to carry me home
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Comin' for to carry me home"

Here is a version of the song sung by the Dublin Gospel Choir.

Harley King

Life is not simple and we are often faced with challenging decisions.  Do you take the easy path or the difficult one?  Do you make courageous decisions or safe ones?  Do you make decisions that build your character or corrupt it?

I am by nature a shy person and this has often led me to make safe decisions.  I don't approach strangers and strike up a conversation.  I don't go up to authors after a speech and introduce myself.  I have, though, made a choice in the work place to overcome my shyness. I will approach strangers and introduce myself as part of my job.

My wife, on the other hand, has never met a stranger.  She will strike up a conversation any place, any time, with people she does not know.  We attended an art fair recently and she spent time talking with artists, engaging them in conversation while I stood by listening and wishing I had that kind of courage.

I also will seek out the easy path, avoiding where possible the dangerous or difficult ones. When driving a car and needing to turn left across a busy street without a stoplight, I choose to turn right and find a driveway or parking lot I can turn around in.

And I often don't make the tough decisions when I disagree with a person.  I will choose not to state my opinion if it will cause friction with someone in a position of authority.

So what impact do these choices have on my character?  How have they helped to create the person I have become? I sometimes think of myself as lacking courage — of lacking a willingness to standup and be counted for something I believe in.  I keep my beliefs to myself and do not stir the waters.

What about you?  How have your choices created the person you are?  Have you been able to make the courageous decisions?

Harley King

I still remember the very first standing ovation that I received 26 years ago.  I had spent three hours speaking to a group of 250 managers.  I was surprised and elated.  I had connected with my audience and moved them to stand and applaud.  As a professional speaker, I have since received numerous standing ovations.  Each one was a powerful form of recognition and appreciation for a job well done.

We all need standing ovations.  We need the people in our lives to recognize and appreciate what we have done.  We need people to say thank you.  You have touched my life.  But we also need to give standing ovations to the people in our lives — to say thank you to a spouse, a child and a friend.  We need to develop an attitude of gratitude.

Most of us are not hermits, living alone, isolated from friends and family.  We need the help of others — including people we have never met — from the person who assembled your cell phone to the farmer who provided the food on your table.  Think how barren your life would be if there were not other people to fill it with laughter and hope.

Who in your life needs a standing ovation today?  Reach out and touch their lives.  Say thank you.  Tell them how much they mean to you.