Many times we have to make our own opportunities. People often complain that they were not given a chance. They fall into "If Only"thinking: "If only I could have gone to school." "If only my boss would have promoted me." "If only my parents loved me." "If only I had a job." "If only someone would publish my book." If only. . . . If only. . . . If only. . . .
If you are going to achieve your dreams and accomplish your goals, you must move beyond "If Only" thinking to "Opportunity" thinking. You must build your own doors and knock on them.
What doors can you build today that you can knock on tomorrow? Building the door to opportunity does not just happen by accident. It takes hard work, belief in oneself and persistence.
We are in charge of our lives. We make choices every day that lead us where we want to be. Life is like a canvas and we are the artists of our lives. We paint the person we want to be. Or we paint the person we think we should be. Or we paint the person we think others want us to be. Are you painting the life you want? Have you chosen a large enough canvas? Are you too stingy with the paint? What color are you painting on the canvas of your life? Blue? Red? Purple? Are you painting flowers? Or dirt? Is the life you are painting happy? Or sad? Or anxious? We tell our stories through what we paint on the canvas. Others will know us by what we paint. They will judge us by the colors we use or fail to use. What stories are you telling? Have you changed the facts to fit the story? Or have you altered the story to fit the facts? Are the pictures of your life filled with people? Or animals? Or is your life a landscape empty of people and animals? Do you prefer the solitude of the mountains or the splashing of waves against the shore? Are you timid in how you approach life? Or do you rush full speed ahead and ignore the red flags popping up every where? Do you splash the paint on the canvas or do you make tiny delicate strokes with your brush? Can you visualize your future? Do you know what you want to paint on the canvas of your life? Do you know what color you want your life to be? Are you only painting the surfaces of your life? Or are you exploring the depths of your soul? If we look into your eyes, what will we see? Every day we pick up the paint brush and add a few strokes of paint to our self-portrait. Is your self-portrait a true picture of who you are? Or do you need to change the paint brushes that you are using? Or do you need to use different colors that better reflect your character and inner beauty? Are you painting the picture you want to paint?
Acting means living, it's all I do and all I'm good at. If I weren't getting paid well, I would still be acting in a small troupe somewhere.
-- Morgan Freeman
American Actor, Film Director
1937 -
Commentary
The question all creative leaders must face is whether they would still create if they didn't get paid for their work. And the answer is in the affirmative for true artists. Many of us will labor for a lifetime without financial reward or recognition or fame. The joy we find in the creative process in the end is our reward.
Do you find joy in the creative process? Can you get lost for hours creating a story, a painting or a poem? I find the creative process in and of itself very rewarding. I feel good. If I go for any period of time without creating something, I find myself feeling down. My mood is impacted by whether or not I have spent time creating something. The creative process brings me joy in a negative, hostile, crazy world.
Why do you think successful writers continue to write? Why do successful songwriters continue to write songs? Why do successful painters continue to paint? Why do successful actors like Morgan Freeman continue to act? Why do movie stars who are paid millions for some of their films take roles in plays that pay them peanuts? The answer is the emotional high they find in creating something. Creative leaders are blessed with the joy of creating.
Creativity is a gift that we have been given. Enjoy the gift for itself. Don't fret over whether you will make any money. There are other ways to make money. Just don't give up on your gift. Keep creating even when you are surrounded by darkness — even when your world is collapsing. For only in the creating to we find salvation, healing and joy.
Creative Practice
This week create something for the sheer joy of creating — a poem, a painting, a story. Enjoy the process and don't worry about publication, selling or perfection.
Biography
Morgan Freeman was born in Memphis, Tennessee to Mayme Edna, a teacher, and Morgan Porterfield Freeman, a barber. He moved frequently in his childhood, living in Mississippi, Indiana and Illinois. Freeman made his acting debut at the age of nine in a school play. He won a statewide drama competition at age 12. He turned own a partial acting scholarship to college to join the US Air Force.
After the Air Force, Freeman lived in Los Angeles, San Francisco and New York, finding work as an actor in various plays. He made his off-Broadway debut in 1967. The following year he debuted on Broadway in Hello, Dolly! His first film appearance was in 1971. He had TV roles in the soap opera, Another World and the kid's show, The Electric Company. He has supporting roles in feature films in the 1980s and closed out the decade with powerful roles in Driving Miss Daisy and Glory in 1989. He played Red, a convict, in The Shawshank Redemption in 1994.
Freeman has received 4 Academy Award nominations including Best Actor nominations in Driving Miss Daisy and The Shawshank Redemption. He won Best Supporting Actor for his performance in Million Dollar Baby.
"If you are just looking to take bows, you'll almost always be disappointed, because the applause is never loud enough."
— Alan Alda
American Actor, Director, Writer
1936 -
Commentary:
As a speaker, I understand almost immediately what Alan Alda is talking about. There are speakers who brag about getting a standing ovation every time they speak. The applause is more important than touching the lives of people. Applause is very short-lived. If you blink, it might have faded away. Yet, people yearn for the applause. Whether you are a writer, a comedian, an artist or an actor, we all crave recognition and praise. Yet the novel, the poem, the painting, or the performance are more important than the reward.
There are writers who become so caught up in the applause that they stop writing and instead live the life of a writer going from party to party enjoying the praise and recognition. Some live off their reputation for the remainder of their lives.
Too much praise and recognition from the general public can be harmful to a person's creativity. They may stop growing and maturing. The key to avoiding the negative impact of applause is to remain humble. True humility will free most people from the harmful impact of praise.
Don't believe your own press releases. You are not as good as people say. And on the flip side, you are not as bad as people say. I have had people tell me that I am the best speaker they have ever heard. Now, either they have never heard any other speakers or they say that to every speaker. Within 15 minutes of the end of the speech the meeting room is empty except for the speaker and the staff who are cleaning up. Most people have moved on with their lives and the applause has faded.
The person we have to learn to please is ourselves, not our readers or our audience. Our readers can be very fickle — love you today and hate you tomorrow. Have you applauded yourself lately? Have you given yourself a standing ovation lately?
Creative Practice:
Cast of M*A*S*H
This week find reasons to give yourself standing ovations. Review previous poems, paintings and stories that you have written or painted and praise the good that you find. Ignore the bad. Be thankful for the gifts that you have been given.
Background:
Alan Alda was born Alphonso Joseph D'Abruzzo in The Bronx, New York City. His father was an actor and singer and his mother was a showgirl. Alda began his acting career in the 1950's as a member of the Compass Players. In 1966, he starred in the musical, The Apple Tree, on Broadway. Alda is remembered most for his role as Hawkeye Pierce in in the TV series, M*A*S*H. He was nominated for 21 Emmy Awards for the show and won five. He also wrote and directed many of the shows. He appeared in all 251 episodes of the series.
Video:
Here is a video of Alan Alda being interviewed on CBS about his memoir, Things I Overheard While Talking To Myself.
Quote Source:
Things I Overheard While Talking To Myself, by Alan Alda
"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes."
— Sally Field
American Actress
November 6, 1946 -
Commentary:
Probably one of the meanest, most destructive critics that creative leaders confront are themselves. We are often harsher on ourselves than we are on our family, peers and friends. We compare ourselves to those around us and believe we are not as good. We believe that others don't like us and are looking down their noses at us. We take a simple negative statement that often is uttered and forgotten to heart and walk around crushed for days and weeks.
Don't judge yourself through the eyes of others. Don't let their negative comments penetrate your heart and soul. Protect yourself from the onslaught of their poisonous arrows. No one can know you better than yourself. Their comments are only their perception of who they think you are. They only see only a part of you. They don't know you.
Creative Practice:
This week make a list of 25 of your positive traits and post them somewhere that you can read them. Read this list aloud to yourself when you wake in the morning and again before you go to bed at night. Carry a copy of the list with you and whenever someone puts you down, pull out your list and read it aloud to yourself.
About the Actress:
Sally Field, the Academy Award winning actress, was born in Pasadena, California to Richard Field, an Army officer, and Margaret Field, an actress. Her parents divorced when she was four. She was a cheerleader in high school. In the 1960s she starred in two TV shows: Gidget and the The Flying Nun. Gidget lasted only 32 episodes (one season) from September, 1965 - April 1966. The Flying Nun lasted for 83 episodes and ran from September, 1967 - September, 1970.
Sally Field starred in the title role of the 1976 TV movie, Sybil, and won an Emmy Award. She co-starred with Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit in 1977. In 1979, she starred in Norma Rae and won the Academy Award for Best Actress. She won a second Best Actress award for the 1984 movie, Places in the Heart.
"I learned you have to trust yourself, be what you are, and do what you ought to do the way you should do it. You have got to discover you, what you do, and trust it."
Learning to trust one's instinct is probably one of the most difficult tasks that every artist needs to learn at some point in one's career. This trust goes deep to the very core of one's being. Trust begins by discovering who you are and accepting yourself. Trust comes with time and experience.
When I speak to an audience, I have learned to trust my instincts — to listen to that small voice inside and do what it asks me to do even when I don't know why. The times I run into problems are when I question that voice and don't listen to it.
The hardest thing for most people to do is to live life to the fullest. Usually we hold ourselves back for various reasons — most of them perceived, not real. We are afraid of the unknown. We are afraid of what might happen. Fear dominates us. We are not willing to risk everything. We choose to play it safe. Are you playing it safe in your art? Or are you swinging for the fences? Are you living the creative life?
Here is Diane Keaton discussing her memoir, Then Again.
"Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: naivete, that fabulous quality that keeps you from knowing just how unsuited you are for what you are about to do."
As creative leaders we must begin each project with beginner's mind. Being naive allows us to try new things without the history of the past. I heard a story of a new garment salesman in New York. Every experienced salesman knew that the buyers did not want to see a salesman during the Christmas holiday so they did not make sales calls. The new guy didn't know the past so he made sales calls and outsold everyone that month. Don't let the myths get in your way. Choose to see the world with the eyes of a child. Be open to new ways, new habits.
Everyone faces challenges and difficulties. No one skates through life without some pain and obstacles. The characters we see on the TV screen or in the movies are not real. Life itself does not have happy endings. No matter when you were born, you will experience loss and death. The key is finding the courage to face the pain, to live with the loss. The pain can make us better artists and writers. Think of all the creative people who have been able to transform the pain of childhood into a powerful motivation for creating their art. What is the pain in your life? How does it transform your art? Does it make you a better person? Are you able to grow beyond the pain?
Do you have faith in your creativity? Do you believe in yourself and your work? Do you wake up cheerful each day eager to begin creating? Gentleness and humor go a long way to making the day joyful. Cultivate humor in your life and heart. Be gentle in your criticism of yourself, your work and your friends. We all need a little more faith to help us through the challenges we face.
Have you been true to yourself? Or have you spent a lifetime wearing masks? Do you know who you are and why you are here? Are you living an authentic life? Or are you hiding even from yourself? We all have struggled to find ourselves and to accept who we are. For some, this struggle has taken longer than others. And some may even go to their grave without discovering who they are. As artists, writers and actors, it is easy to be attracted to wearing masks and disguises. At the very least, we should not lie to ourselves. Even if we don't let others see the true us, we must look inward with clear vision. We must be true to ourselves.
"One of the things I learned the hard way was that it doesn't pay to get discouraged. Keeping busy and making optimism a way of life can restore your faith in yourself."
— Lucille Ball
American Actress
1911 - 1989
It is very easy for creative leaders to become discouraged and depressed when their ideas don't work out. Yet what good does it do to wallow in self-pity and discouragement? We become less productive and might even stop creating all together. The challenge is to find ways to keep our chin up and to keep moving forward. Having spent the first 35 years of my life as a pessimist, I know it takes work to become an optimist. And it is easy to backslide. Being down on ourselves does us no good. We need to keep the faith. We need to believe in ourselves.
Here's part one of a documentary of Lucille Ball's life.
Many of us take ourselves too seriously. We need to learn to laugh at ourselves. We all make mistakes. We all screw-up. When we learn to laugh at our mistakes, we begin to heal the pain. None of us are perfect, even those of us who try to be. For years perfection has been one of my goals whether I was speaking or writing and I have had to learn a hard lesson that it is okay to make a mistake. I have had to learn to relax and to laugh at myself. In fact, mistakes make us better people, more human.
"For all the major moves in my life — to Baltimore, to Chicago, to own my show, and to end it — I've trusted my instincts. I take in all the information I can gather. I listen to proposals, ideas, and advice. Then I go with my gut, what my heart feels most strongly."
When making decisions, one should always gather the information and opinions available. But in the end, when it is decision time, one should listen to one's gut. One must learn to trust that quiet voice deep inside. Listening to one's gut requires silence. At some point, one must shut out the voices sharing their opinions and make up one's own mind.
As artists and writers, this is important advice. We must learn to trust ourselves. There are friends, teachers, critics and even strangers who are happy to share their opinions about our creative works. While it is important that we listen to what they say, we must learn to sort through the garbage and find a few nuggets of truth. And in the end, we must listen to our own quiet voice telling us what to paint or write.
"Be brave enough to live creatively. The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. You cannot get there by bus, only by hard work, risking and by not quite knowing what you are doing. What you will discover will be wonderful: yourself."
— Alan Alda
American Actor, Director, Screenwriter
1936 -
Have you visited the wilderness of your intuition? Have you listened to the voice within your spirit? Have you descended into the depths of your soul? Have you discovered the nature of your existence? Creativity is a journey of the spirit to realms not seen by the ordinary eye. If you have been blessed with the opportunity to travel this road, then you understand the healing power within your soul. God walks with each of us. We must learn to decipher his voice from the chaotic noise so we may enjoy the majesty of beauty.
Many times we have to make our own opportunities. People often complain that they were not given a chance. They fall into "If Only" thinking: "If only I could have gone to school." "If only my boss would have promoted me." "If only my parents loved me." If only. . . . If only. . . . If only. . . . If you are going to achieve your dreams and accomplish your goals, you must move beyond "If Only" thinking to "Opportunity" thinking. You must build your own doors and knock on them.
What doors can you build today that you can knock on tomorrow? Building the door to opportunity does not just happen by accident. It takes hard work, belief in oneself and persistence.
We are in charge of our lives. We make choices every day that lead us where we want to be. Life is like a canvas and we are the artists of our lives. We paint the person we want to be. Or we paint the person we think we are. We tell our stories through the art. Are you painting the life you want? Have you chosen a large enough canvas? Are you too stingy with the paint?
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