Monday, July 25, 2016
Carl Rogers — Paradox of Change
Have you ever had a desire to change who you are? Have you ever dreamed of waking up and being somebody different? That is one of the fun things about being a novelist or an actor. Novelists and short story writers can become the characters inside the stories they tell. I once wrote a short story, Bath Day, in which I inserted my real self as a minor character seen through the eyes of the main character. Actors take on the character of others. They play heroes and villains. They experience death, love, sorrow and laughter in the skin of imaginary characters.
Most of us have struggled with our self-identity. We may not like our physical looks or the bill-paying work that we do or the fact that we have grown old. We may think that we are poor husbands, wives or parents. And yet, if we learn to accept who we are and what we have done, then we can begin to change into who we want to be.
Have you ever tried to change your habits? Stop smoking? Lose weight? Start exercising? Learn another language? Leave the toilet seat down? Some people say it takes 21 days to form a new habit. Personal change is never easy. We need to learn to be more forgiving of ourselves and those with whom we share our lives. None of us are perfect. And if change is difficult for us, don't you think it is just as difficult for those you love. Learn to be gentle with yourself and those you love.